Today, I’m on my way into the city and I’m taking the train in.

The Metro-North has two kinds of trains; fully electric, used on the lower portion of the line and diesel locomotive pulling passenger cars on the upper portion of the line. That’s the kind I’m on right now, one of those diesel jobbies.

Another difference in the two trains is how you enter the car. The electric trains have doors controlled entirely by the conductor but the diesel’s have alcoves at either end of the car. There is a door to the platform from the alcove (controlled by the conductor) and a door from the alcove into the passenger car itself.

The door on the car I’m in is broken. They have automatic doors now and this one just isn’t working meaning you have to slide the door open and closed yourself.

Easy enough.

And if you don’t close the door, it’s very drafty and noisy so of course the next stop after I get on, some idiot opens the door and plops down in the set of seats right next to the door.

Given the choice between sitting in a drafty, noisy car and not, I loudly say, “CLOSE THE DOOR!”

And lo! Aforementioned moron gets up and closes the door but not before he replies (although he really doesn't know who said close the door), “PLEASE!”

Priceless.

PLEASE, use your common sense.

PLEASE, stop being an asshole.

PLEASE, show some consideration for the other people riding in the car.

That work for you bunky? Simply amazing.